For Jennifer-Lynn

Because you insisted I update my blog, this is for you.

Because I am 12....

...I saw this and laughed. And then bought it for Alanna for Christmas.

Sigh

I just received the following IM on JDate. His name has been redacted to protect the stupid:

Him: I want to see you naked.

Now, just out of curiosity, what exactly was I supposed to do with that? Even if he was the most gorgeous thing to have ever walked the earth, did he really think I was going to get naked for him?

Sometimes, being on JDate is totally mind boggling. So far I've gotten a 25 year old who said he only dates older girls (weep) because he's "more on their level," a bi-sexual dude, and one who offered to "orally pleasure" me. Thankfully I've had a couple of good dates. Otherwise I'd probably go postal.

Lord Give Me Strength

I joined JDate again.

It's like some drug I just can't kick. There's just this terrible pull that brings me back there. Maybe it's the fact that Aaron met Nicole there, or that other people I know have met their significant others on the site. Granted, I have met some very nice guys (the very sweet yet boring G, amongst others). But I've also met some incredible douchebags. I guess, if nothing else, it will provide fodder for this blog.

Seriously. Lord give me strength.

Om?

Russell Simmons was just doing some yoga stretches outside of my apartment, after stepping out of a giant stretch limo with a model and two little girls who I assume are his kids. What do you think that means?

Stalking the WGA Picket Line

Did I hit a new low today?

Let me just start by saying that I'm in full support of the Writers' strike. They do the work, they deserved to be paid. Seems to be common sense.

This morning I noticed that they had set up a picket line outside of the Time Warner Center. I went over to show my support. I don't really know how much I can do, so I took a flier (which is prominently displayed at my desk).

Being the celeb lover that I am, I knew that the glorious Tina Fey and several SNL castmembers had been picketing at 30 Rock earlier in the week, so I figured I might get some cool sightings on the line by me. After our meeting this morning, Kim and I went for coffee, and since she needed to check in on Williams-Sonoma, we decided to just peak at who was walking the line.

The first person to catch my eye was Tim Robbins. I recognized a few writers, a few character actors. I told Kim that I felt kind of bad just standing there and gawking, so we decided to head back up to the office.

And then I saw him.

Green jacket, shades, general hotness. It was the man of my dreams. It was David Duchovny.

Of course, all else sort of disappeared at that moment. Well, other than an intense desire to jump him. Thing is, it's not like I haven't seen him before. But the combination that he was A) supporting the cause B) Right near my office and C) Hot...well, this was just all too overwhelming. Needless to say I spent the next couple of hours feeling slightly hot and bothered.

Here's where I hit my low. I decided to return to the the line and stalk him. I mean, what's wrong with me? Here are these people marching for a real purpose, and all I want to do is drool over Mulder. I got mine when I walked back over there and he had gone. So I stood there, and stalked other celebs. There was Oliver Platt, and Seth Meyers and Fred Armisen (who I sat behind when I saw "King Kong" in the theater a couple of years ago).

Listen, there are definitely worse things I could have done. I mean, it's not like I bothered them. And like I said, I fully support them. I think they know people are going to stop and look. But I'd like to take this opportunity to apologize to the fine folks of the WGA and SAG, and tell them that my staring at them is only with the best of intentions. (And in the future, please understand that if the deliciousness that is Duchovny is on your line, I will most likely be there again).

*UPDATE*
In reading some articles about the celebs who were on the line, I discovered that not only were they blessed with Duchovny, but Christopher Meloni and his Ass of Life also walked the line. Had I seen these two men in the same space at one time, I am fairly sure my head would have exploded.

Judah Friedlander Thinks I'm Awesome

After posting a nice long diatribe about how New Yorkers leave celebrites alone, what do I go ahead and do on Saturday night? I get in the face of a celebrity. I am incredibly proud of myself.

I met up with Jamie, Melissa, and Jodi for some drinks on Saturday night near my apartment. I had a couple, and as I was staggering home, I noticed Judah Friedlander, the World Champion, standing in front of a comedy club near my place. I actually really like him-let's be honest, anyone who was in "American Splendor" and is on "30 Rock" can't be all that bad. So because I'd had a couple of Hoegaardens, I figured hey, Abby should see a picture of someone from "30 Rock" and I whip out my cellphone camera. In the back of my mind, Sober Jen told me to put my camera away, but Nicely Toasted Jen seemed to win out. He saw me taking the pic, and here was his reaction, luckily:



He did say hello to me, and I went a little batshit and started telling him how much I loved "30 Rock" (which I do). I then said "You're awesome!" He looked me straight in the eyes and said, totally deadpan, "No. YOU'RE awesome." You know, I kind of fell in love with him at that moment.

So it seems that I will harrass a celeb under the right circumstances. Those circumstances include but are not limited to being drunk with your friends. Sometimes I'm just really proud of myself.

I'M HUGE!!

So here's how my week has gone.

-July 25, 2008-The release date for the new X-Files movie.

http://www.killermovies.com/x/xfiles2/news/705_The_X_Files_2_Going_For_July_25_2008_Release.html

-Joel Hodgson has announced that he and several of the MST3K founding fathers (including the most cuddly TV's Frank) are starting a new venture called "Cinematic Titanic."

http://www.cinematictitanic.com/

-Bob Odenkirk and David Cross have apparently submitted scripts-yes, more than one-to HBO.

http://www.bobanddavid.com/2007/10/bob_was_here_and_now_everythin.html#more

Basically, it's been this geek's dream week. I'm off to eat another Reese's Peanut Butter cup in celebration.

*And in a happy post-script to my last entry, Jen and all of my San Diego friends are safe and sound. So I should probably eat yet another Reese's to celebrate that as well.*

San Diego is Burning

250,000 people are being evacuated. Jen and Alanna are just two of them. Carlos is staying behind for work. Jen and Peanut are heading out to Palm Springs with Yude and Molly. I feel better knowing they're going. Jamie is apparently far enough away that she's alright, but told me she had some ash on her car and could see the smoke in the sky. If it gets bad I know she'll go too.

San Diego has become one of my favorite places to visit, not just because the Archuletas have made their home there (and JSD too). I feel extremely relaxed each time I go out there-and that's tough to do with Alanna hitting the peak of the terrible two's (as I said to Jen last time I was out there, "You know what's going to be awesome? Three!"). It's just an amazing place to be, complete with zoos, wineries, and really great people. I've been lucky enough to become friends with Jen's friends (especially Yuderson, who when I said I might be coming back in the spring threatened me with bodily harm until I said that I would definitely be coming back in the spring). It feels like another home to me.

So as cheesy as it sounds, I'm thinking about the good people of San Diego right now, and hoping this gets under control as soon as possible. And I can't wait to be back out there in a few months.

I'm Not Stalking Mary-Louise Parker

Really. I'm not. She just happens to live the next block over from me. And I tend to run into her as she's walking her children through the park. She's lovely. Tiny, pretty, and always wearing something I covet. Yet I'd never say a word to her. That's just the New York way. We see, we smile, we move on. My neighborhood is a hotspot for celebrity sightings. I see Philip Seymour Hoffman all the time. I saw Aida Tuturro and her adorable dog in the dog run. I've yet to see Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick, however. Her I'm whatever about, but a Ferris sighting might be fun. And can I just take this opportunity to say that I must be the only woman in all of New York who couldn't give a shit less about the "Sex and The City" movie? I mean, was it really necessary? At this point, there's no reason to see it anyway because the press has printed about six million stills from the shoot everywhere. You know, I actually sort of didn't mind the show when it first came on, but by the end I was so sick of Carrie and her whining, and the only characters I really liked were Miranda and Steve.

But I digress.

In other news, it was a rather eventful weekend. Friday, after doing some store checks with Kim, we headed back to Hoboken to have some beers. I ended up getting rather sad and nostalgic for my Hoboken days. I really loved it out there. On the PATH back into the city I started to think about the fact that the person who lived there and the person I currently am are two different people, and there's a lot I miss about Hoboken-era Jen. Maybe I can work on finding that feeling again. Not sure. It might have left when D did.

Saturday, a large group of us made it out to Long Island for some pumpkin picking, pie eating and wine tasting. All-in-all it was a really fun day, and it was great to have the majority of my friends in one spot. Things are so different now. It's hard to get us all together these days. Everyone has their own lives....it all sounds so trite but I wish sometimes that we could be like we used to be. Just be able to pick up and go away for a weekend without any of the responsibilities of debt, marriages, relationships in general, big people jobs, and of course, children. Granted I probably wouldn't be saying that if I was in a relationship and spawning. I just think about how nice it would be to be able to call up some of my friends and say "come get a drink with me" and not have a litany of reasons why they can't. Just how life goes, I guess.

Which brings us to Sunday. I decided to call things off with G. It was a long time coming, since we've been involved for several months, and I've been bored for most of it. He's a really sweet guy, but there was no spark. I've had most of my friends tell me that I probably won't get butterflies everytime I start a new relationship. But I wanted something...anything at all! Put it this way: In most other relationships I've been in, at the end of a long day all I wanted to do was either call the guy up and tell him about the little details of my day or skip the phone call completely and go be with them. I cancelled plans with my friends to be with them. I was disappointed if the guy cancelled on me! With G, if he cancelled, I was anything but disappointed. Free night for me! I had plans with him on Friday, and about midway through my second drink with Kim I realized I had absolutely no desire to leave Hoboken and go see him-I wanted to stay with my friend. No offense to Kim, but I should have wanted to return to the city immediately to see him. It just wasn't there, and I tried, I really did, but the last thing I wanted to do was force it. There was also the fact that he seemed completely indifferent to me at times. I don't know if that was just his laid back/pseudo-stoner attitude, or maybe he just wasn't a PDA sort of guy. I just wanted some indication that he actually was into me. So when he called me on Sunday and I broke it to him that this wasn't working, I kind of hoped for something to indicate that maybe I was being hasty. A "I really liked hanging out with you." Or how about a simple "I like you!" Nothing. I think I regretted my choice for about a second. Now my attitude is, on to the next one. Maybe I should try double-dating with Mary-Louise Parker....

I Watch TV

It's not a lie. I do in fact watch TV. A lot of it. I'm not ashamed. At this point, it's a badge of honor. My vast amount of useless knowledge has to come from somewhere, right? And it's not like I'm a shut in and that's all I do. I read too! Apparently I also write.

So from time to time I'm going to write about what I'm currently watching on TV. Again, there's a lot. But I'll pick and choose.

There hasn't been all that much in the crop of new shows that have caught my eye. I probably would have watched "Chuck," except I was so beaten over the head with ads for it that I was completely turned off. Aaron informed me that it was a good thing I'm not a football fan, because when "House" was about to come on a few years ago, all sports fans were apparently inundated with the same ad for my favorite TV doctor. I'm not sure why the ad people think this is a good strategy, but I guess it works since I read this morning that "Chuck" was picked up by the network.

The only two shows that even seemed remotely interesting to me were "Pushing Daisies" and "Dirty Sexy Money." "Pushing Daisies" was too colorful for me not to check out. The first episode, or the "Pie-lette" as it was so cleverly called, was fun. It's the story of a man who discovered as a child that he had an interesting gift-he could bring the dead back to life with one touch. There are several caveats, however (as there always are). They can only stay alive for one minute, or someone else has to die to take their place. And a second touch will kill them again, forever. It's very quirky-in fact, my first thought when watching it was that this was "Six Feet Under" on crack. My concern for this show is that it might be too cutesy for its own good, and the shtick might wear thin quickly. But I think I'll stick it out for a couple more episodes, if for no other reason that apparently Paul Reubens is going to be a guest star at some point.

"Dirty Sexy Money" was an instant draw based on the presence of both Peter Krause and Donald Sutherland. After loving Michael C. Hall as "Dexter" (one of my new favorites as well), I figured I should see what the other Fisher brother was up to. "Dirty Sexy Money" is a throwback to the nighttime soaps my parents used to watch: "Dynasty," "Dallas," etc. It's trashy, the performances are over the top, and I love it. I'd say my only issue is that I've been supremely spoiled by "Arrested Development." I'm comparing all of the characters to the Bluths. Two completely different shows, that's for sure.

So there you go, the first installment of what I'm sure will be a long running feature here at Binky the Doormat. I'm Jen, I Watch TV, and I'm proud of it.

Taste

I started cooking again fairly recently. I wouldn't call myself a top notch chef by any stretch of the imagination. I'm great at following recipes, but I get nervous anytime I have to deviate from what's on the paper in front of me. Just last night I was trying to make chili using a recipe Nicole gave me, and I went into full panic mode when I couldn't find several of the ingredients listed on the page. But what I lack in flexibility I gain in enthusiasm. I consider any edible meal an achievement, as evidenced by my pure and utter joy when my chili came out quite well, thank you very much.

I stopped cooking a few years ago when my relationship ended, mostly because the memories were too painful. I absolutely loved cooking for D. I was a happy homemaker, pawing through recipe books, shopping for boxes of meats and vegetables from Fresh Direct, cooking extravagent meals and taking full delight in any compliment I received from him. I relished my hours in the kitchen. As far as I was concerned, a well cooked meal was an extension of how much I loved him.

When we broke up, that excitement for cooking shrivled up along with several other things I used to take simple pleasure in. Certain songs became too difficult to listen too (I still can't hear The Cure or Weezer without thinking of him), movies, TV shows, even restaurants...they were all him, and our relationship. Cooking represented something that I had done for us, and to do it for only me just seemed pathetic.

I made a half-assed effort to start cooking again in my old apartment, but Jay is a natural in the kitchen. I'd watch wide-eyed as he'd cook from scratch, throwing random spices into a pan in between pulls off his bowl, blasting his Ipod off the little travel speakers he has. Milo would wait patiently on the floor for Uncle Jay to drop anything, anything at all. He inspired me, but my attempts to contribute to the meals of our apartment just paled in comparison.

About a month or so ago, I was sitting in Aaron and Nicole's house and I noticed-don't laugh-a Kraft recipe magazine. It's some free thing she gets, but for whatever reason, just thumbing through the recipes, I got strangely inspired. Nicole signed me up for my own free Kraft magazine (which actually hasn't come yet) but for whatever reason, that got me going.

So, in the last few weeks I've started pawing through the recipe books again, buying boxes of food from Fresh Direct, and reveling in the pleasure it's giving me. Yes, I have Abby to sample my wares as well, but, no offense to her, this is for me. This is to show me I am allowed to love doing these things, that yes, I cooked for D, but hopefully someday I'll cook for someone else. And for now, I'm loving my time in the kitchen.

Welcome to Binky the Doormat

So after having my MySpace account hacked twice, I decided to take this elsewhere. Maybe I'll have a little more freedom to write here as well. All I know is that I should be doing more writing (everyone tells me as much), so here I am, and here it is.

Why the title? Well, for starters, it's the title of an REM song. Look it up, listen to it, love it. It comes from my favorite REM album, the very underrated "New Adventures in Hi-fi." Dennis and I used to talk about having a "soundtrack to your life," and almost every song on New Adventures would be on my soundtrack. (Actually, "So Fast So Numb"=Dennis, so there you go).

Ok, I started it. More to come....